The “holding hand” of The Elementary School To Middle School To High School To College PipelineTM ends and then….. What happens now? The questions pile: Why do I live like this? Should I do it like them? Should I start a new career? Should I pull an “Into the Wild” ? (That man was brazenly unprepared to live in the Alaskan wilderness, but I still loved that movie). Who loves me? Who do I love? Am I living the life I want? Can I get there NOW?

If you too are in your Quarter Life CrisisTM: the following is an outline of how my yoga practice has helped me settle these worries:

I know that my life will end at my death. I know that, and I still try to get past my youth, fast. Why am I rushing to my final destination? Two answers:

• Attitudinal/Internalized Adultism: masking myself to appear as more adult/mature in order to be taken seriously

• Internalized Capitalism: basing my life’s worth off of what I have accomplished/created

When you live under the umbrella of an adultist/capitalist society, you are programmed to live in absence of the present moment. Adultism entitles adults to act upon young people without their permission. This treatment is reinforced by the social institutions, laws, and customs that carry the belief that adults are better than young people. The same exact institutions, laws, and customs that hold the hand of capitalism, which tells us the value of our life lives in our output. As youths, when we internalize adultism and capitalism, we regulate our own behavior so that it does not have to be monitored or corrected by adults. We mask our silliness, our loudness, our curiosity and instead we accomplish, we comply, and we continue on with that pattern ingrained in our minds. When people internalize one form of oppression, they become accustomed to accepting other forms of oppression: racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, ageism. We cannot be present when we are unconsciously and passively accepting oppression. We cannot be present when we are programmed to react in a way that placates the oppressor.

Yoga unravels neural pathways (samskaras) - or the deeply rooted beliefs that keep one stuck - through the tools of: breath, posture, observation, and time. When we focus our attention on the tools of the practice, our yoga unveils awareness of the unconscious patterns that keep us stuck. The message will keep revealing itself to us until we resolve the samskara in its entirety. Then, a new message will appear. These messages never stop coming because of the nature of the human body and mind. We are naturally programmed to refer to the past in our present moment dealings. Sometimes this can keep us safe, sometimes it can keep us stuck. Our yoga can help us find more helpful “factory settings” or new automatic patterns that are more aligned with truth (satya). 

My yoga has helped me unsnarl the samskaras that adultism and capitalism have imprinted within me through the avenue of “boundaries”. I see boundaries as a combination of moderation (brahmacharya), non-harming (ahimsa), discipline (tapas), self study (svadhyaya), and surrender (isvara-pranidhana). Boundaries are the rules and laws you make for yourself. What you do and do not accept from others. Your boundaries are your choice. Boundaries change person to person. Circumstance to circumstance. Since boundaries can change over time, they are a practice of presence. Boundaries actively combat adultism and capitalism because one is choosing to act authentically. One is choosing to not appease the oppressor. This choice requires awareness of the present moment and what it means to you. Being able to set boundaries communicates to you and others that your voice matters, your needs matter, you matter. My yoga has shown me that showing up presently and authentically is the most potent way to combat oppression because it inspires aligned action and self-expression.

When I am my truest self, I can experience pockets of pure presence where no samskaras or oppressions are informing my actions. Present moment informed by present moment. And it is so powerful. But at the same time, those moments of enlightenment in the human body (samadhi) and non-attachment (aparigraha) do not last forever because we keep living. Entering new experiences. These experiences (good or bad) then start to inform our new neural pathways. And we have to continue to do the work. Do the yoga. My yoga teaches me that one breath will lead to the next breath to the next to the next. One yoga pose will lead to the next pose to the next to the next. Until the class is over. And there are no more breaths to offer in the hour and there are no more poses to be had in the class. The class ends.

Just as a wave is a different way for water to be for some time. And just as a yoga pose is a different way for your body to be for some time. Your body's a different way for your soul to be for some time. And just as the wave crashes and the water returns to the ocean. And you exit the yoga pose and you land in savasana. Your soul will return where it is meant to go. With all the other souls. At the end of the yoga class, what matters to me is if I lived each moment as it happened. If I embraced each stage and phase as it came. If I adjusted my actions to align with the present moment. If I heard my yoga’s message for me to be here and to meet myself and to see what is. 

I will get to the end. You will get to the end. You and I have the same ultimate, final destination. So we will walk each other there, together. Safely. With love and joy and care and respect. And not tolerating oppression towards any being along the way. With a warm embrace for our youth, our middle age, our old age as they arrive. The universe will welcome us with open arms. But, we are in no rush to get there. Because we are here, now. Enjoying our humanness. At the stage we are in now. Fully embracing the vessel we were given for this life.